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  • Control Freaks… All of us?

    Posted on June 30th, 2009 Angad 1 comment

    Control.

    Its such a resonating word. Resonates with every person. All crave for control. Every one has their own way of achieving that position of control.

    Some use love, some sex, some care, and some plain old brute strength.

    Isn’t it amazing there can be so many ways, completely different from each other to achieve the same objective? Control.

    A parent punishes his or her child to show that the child’s life is in their control, a child goes ahead and falls sick or gets a injury to show(read rebel) to their parents, NO You cant control me, Now start taking care of me, I am in control. and that’s what it gets.

    The fight for control, leads to drained people, drained of their energy, their zest of life consumed with achieving control on their as well as the surrounding people’s life. Its the latter one that really screws up everything.

    Trying to achieve control over one’s own life is a good thing in my opinion, trying to do the same with other people’s lives, is not so good. People form rules, regulations, limitations which if are broken by the person they want control on, he/she should be punished. The ways of punishment can be very diverse, the way a parent punishes his/her child, the way a lover punished his/her lover, the way a teacher punishes his/her student, or the way a friend punishes his/her friend.

    Not talking, not giving, no sex, no interaction, no helping hand, these are just a few examples of punishment as well as control methods.

    And the irony of this whole control issue is that, 95% of the times, we do it so naturally, we dont even have to formulate any strategies, it’s so sick that it’s so normal to us to try and control other people. but in this sickness, lies the cure as well.

    Name the control drama when you feel some one is trying to control you. It would work efficiently most of the times, because it makes the person conscious of what he/she i doing. If some one is intimidating you, its probably, he/she just wants you to behave in a certain manner failing which you get out of their control, so naming the control drama, as in asking it simply, “Why are you so angry?” works in a way that their conscious brain looks at itself, it sees what its doing unconsciously. and they hold themselves. coming back to a more sane way of conversation.

    If some one is being overly interrogative, just ask them, why are you so interested? believe me, it will make them think the same question and then in the next sentence they speak they will come from a calmer place.

    Till I need to blabber again.

    ciao 🙂

     

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